THE SOMETIME POLITICIAN, unsuccessful Republican Vice Presidential candidate, half-term quitter Alaska State Governor and occasional slaughteress of defenseless wildlife, Sarah Palin has waved her email account hacker off to prison.
Palin, who recently had to fire several shots to finally, painfully dispatch a caribou live on television and has called for political opponents to be treated in a similar fashion, and who has recently used the anti-semitic term ‘blood libel’ in an attempt to deflect criticisms of her clear incitement to violence against her politial opponents, had been the victim of an apparently very easy email hack attack in 2008.
Although many thought it was unlikely that the hacker, who didn’t really have to do much in the way of hacking, would get a sentenced to a term in prison, he has. Much, we suspect, to Mama Grizzly’s grizzly delight.
The decision to imprison him flies in the face of a recommendation from Judge John Phillips, who had suggested that serving time in a halfway house would be a suitable punishment. However in this case, harsh punishment seems to have been the government stance and the sentencing judge agreed.
Perhaps the US is stepping up its sentences for Internet crimes in the wake of the embarrassing Wikileaks revelations, or perhaps its Bureau of Prisons just had a cell to spare, but it seems that David Kernell, 23, is already in a federal institution some 300 miles from home.
According to a report by the BBC, US government officials or, as we prefer to imagine, shadowy, black helicopter riding men in black, have confirmed that he is already blowing on his porridge and keeping his khaki trousers and cot neat and presentable at a Club Fed facility in Ashland, Kentucky.
Kernell might be glad that his prison will likely keep Palin out, given her history of violent rhetoric and her demonstrated enthusiasm for shooting, but we couldn’t possibly comment further. µ
Category: Prison Time